


Suicide by Small Increments

by kair0s



Category: Batman (Comics), DCU (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics), Red Robin (Comics), Under the Red Hood
Genre: Angst, Breaking Up & Making Up, M/M, Rating subject to change, just playing it safe for now, the title is just from a song that inspired the story, this fic has nothing to do with suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2017-05-01
Packaged: 2018-09-11 15:23:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,821
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8995654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kair0s/pseuds/kair0s
Summary: He messed up. He messed up so bad.





	1. Chapter 1

“Tim, are you there?” Dick called gently, tapping on the younger Robin’s door. “No one’s seen you in a few days, we’re worried about you.” 

Tim had come home from the Titans a few days ago and immediately gone on patrol. No one had seen him after that, and his bedroom door had been locked ever since. Bruce let it go for two days before he asked Dick to call the Titans. 

“I called the Titans and they said they haven’t heard from you since you came home,” Dick continued when he didn’t get a response. “Maybe you should call them, because they’re worried now too.”

“I’m _not_ calling them,” was Tim’s muffled response from behind the door.

Well, at least we know where he is and that he’s alive now, Dick thought. “Did something happen when you were with them last week?”

Dick heard shuffling sounds from the other side of the door and prayed that Tim was coming to talk to him. He was disappointed when the door didn’t open before Tim spoke again.

“Listen,” Tim said, sighing, “I know that you care about me and you mean well, but I can’t talk to you. Not now, not about...this.”

Dick leaned against his side of the door. “And you can’t talk to the Titans?”

Even out in the hallway, Dick could tell that Tim tensed up. “No,” Tim said curtly.

Dick scowled, resting his head on the door, wishing Tim would just open the door and let him really talk to him. “Well if you won’t talk to me about it and you can’t talk to the Titans, can you at least call Jason?” Dick couldn’t believe he was actually suggesting Jason. Even though Tim and Jason had been dating for the better half of a year now, Dick still didn’t entirely approve of their relationship. Dick wasn’t as bad as Bruce, but he wasn’t as accepting as the rest of the family.

There was a loud noise on the other side of the door that startled Dick into jumping back away from the room. “Timmy, are you okay? It sounded like something was just thrown against the wall--”

“Just leave me alone, Dick!”

Dick stepped back, stunned. All he knew was that something was wrong with Tim and that for some reason, Jason was the last person he wanted to go to about it.

\----------

Dick strode into Bruce’s study, not even bothering to knock. “We need to talk about Tim.”

Bruce put down the book he was reading, looking past Damian who was sitting in the chair across his desk. “Did he come out of his room?”

“Why should we care if Drake locks himself in his room,” Damian said, scowling. “He goes days without eating and sleeping all the time.”

Bruce held Dick’s gaze, taking in the concern in his eyes. “You said his door was locked?”

Dick nodded before looking at the youngest Robin. “Tim forgets to take care of himself a lot, but he never locks his door. That’s why he leaves his door unlocked.” 

“Still, Drake is practically an adult and besides, he can just ask Todd if he really needs--”

“Damian, why don’t you go and see if Alfred needs help putting dinner together,” Bruce said, clearly ordering and not suggesting. 

Damian sat for a moment before getting up with a huff and leaving the room without another word. 

Dick waited until Damian was gone and the door was shut behind him before he sat down across from Bruce. He told him about his exchange with Tim.

“So you think Jason did something?” Bruce asked, sounding surprisingly neutral.

“I don’t know what else it could be,” Dick said. “I think he’s afraid to talk to anybody about whatever happened because he knows not everyone is happy that he’s dating Jason.”

“Are you sure it isn’t anything that happened between him and the Titans?”

“I mean, no, but he seemed fine when he came back from San Francisco and--”

“Did you see him when he got back? Because I didn’t. Alfred said that he heard Tim come by and drop of his things when he got back from his trip, but he didn’t see him because he went right out on patrol and has been locked in his room ever since.”

Dick’s brow furrowed. “Now that I think of it, I didn’t see him on patrol that night, did you?”

Bruce shook his head. “There’s no record of him going on patrol since he got back from his trip. I wasn’t going to say anything because I assumed that he was just lying about visiting Jason when he got back.”

“Why would he lie about that? They’ve been dating long enough now that even though we’re not all happy about it, they don’t have to sneak around all the time,” Dick said, sounding annoyed.

“If think you should talk to Jason,” Bruce said finally. “Aside from us and the Titans, he’s the only one who might have an idea of what’s going on with Tim.”

Dick didn’t even waste his breath suggesting that Bruce be the one to talk to Jason. He knew that would just be more stressful for everyone involved. He was just surprised that Bruce had even suggested it.

\----------

Dick knocked, loudly, on the door to Jason’s safehouse. After a frustrated sigh, he looked around to make sure no one was in earshot. “Jason, come on, I know you’re here. Roy told me where to find you.”

The sound of footsteps was followed by the sound of numerous locks being undone on the other side of the door. After a moment, the door was cracked open and Dick found himself looking into Jason’s bloodshot teal eyes. 

“To what do I owe the pleasure, Dickiebird?”

“You look like hell,” Dick blurted out. 

“Wonderful,” Jason muttered. “If you’d like to come in and continue to insult me in the comfort of my own home, be my guest,” he said before opening the door all the way. 

Dick walked in, looking around a bit before looking back at Jason, who had made his way to the kitchen and was making coffee for the two of them. “I’m, um, here to talk about Tim,” Dick said, finally.  
Jason visibly tensed up, freezing with a mug in each hand and just standing at the kitchen counter, motionless for a second.

“Jason, I’m not here to accuse you of anything, but Tim’s been locked in his room for days and he won’t talk to anyone. No one knows what’s wrong, not even the Titans, and--”

The sound of a mug crashing on the floor interrupted Dick, startling him. “Are you okay?”

Jason laughed, a dark, humorless laugh that made Dick’s skin crawl. “No, I’m not okay,” he answered, bracing his hands on the counter, clinging to it for dear life as he stared down at his feet. 

“I think Tim’s leaving me.”

Dick didn’t know if he should move towards Jason or give him his space. He sounded so broken, but Dick was also beginning to get the idea that maybe Tim had a good reason for leaving Jason. “What happened? Why is he leaving you?”

Jason opened his mouth to reply before shutting it tightly. “You think that I fucked up, don’t you?” When Dick didn’t say anything, he continued. “You think that I did something to hurt Tim.”

Guilt washed over Dick in waves because Jason’s statement wasn’t wrong, really. His first thought when Tim had shut himself away was that Jason had done something to him. Even though Dick hadn’t consciously come to that conclusion, he still felt like shit about it.

“Should I even waste my breath telling you that I didn’t do anything to him?” Jason asked, turning to face Dick.

Dick frowned, pushing through his guilt to get to the bottom of things. “I just want to know what happened between the two of you to make him this upset.”

“It wasn’t something that happened between me and Tim,” Jason said, staring at his feet again. His gaze was tense, but kind of absent, like he was experiencing some sort of nightmare somewhere far away from the kitchen he was standing in. It reminded Dick of when he had seen Jason have flashbacks to the Lazarus Pit.

“What do you mean?” Dick asked, slowly approaching Jason. “Stick with me, okay? You’re safe here, we’re in your kitchen.”

Jason snapped out of it a little when he realized that Dick thought he was having an episode. He opened his mouth like he was going to say something, but then he shut it again, grimacing. “I just feel so...used.”

Dick stopped, standing right in front of Jason. That wasn’t the word he had been expecting his successor to say. Jason often called himself stupid, or frustrated, or angry, but Dick had never heard him talk about himself like this. 

“Jay, please,” Dick said, reaching out and putting his hand on Jason’s shoulder. “Tell me what happened.”

Jason averted his eyes, staring at his own clenched fists. He didn’t even shake Dick’s hand off of his shoulder. He sniffled, unclenching his fists and letting his arms go limp.

“Tim cheated on me.”


	2. Chapter 2

Someone was knocking at the door again.

Tim rolled over in this bed, pulling his pillow over his ears. Despite the extra padding, he heard whoever had been knocking start to jiggle the doorknob. _Bruce wouldn’t do that,_ Tim thought to himself. _And I doubt Dick would try to come in without saying anything first._

It wasn’t until Tim heard the clicking noise of his lock being picked that he sat up. He didn’t really have it in him to fend anyone off at this point, so he just sat on his bed, waiting for the intruder.

The door swung open, revealing Stephanie Brown in all of her blonde and purple glory. She was breathing heavily and her expression was an odd mix of pissed off and worried sick.

“Timothy Jackson, I don’t even know where to start with you,” Steph exclaimed, slamming the door behind her. “I’ve been getting phone calls from the Titans all day. What the hell is going on?”

Tim hugged his knees against his chest, leaning back against his headboard. He wouldn’t look at Steph; he just kept his eyes glued to the sheets on his bed.

Steph crossed the room and sat in front of him on his bed, reaching out and putting her hands on top of his knees. “Timmy, please, talk to me,” she pleaded.

“I can’t,” he said, practically whispering. 

“Since when can’t you talk to me?” Steph asked. “Or the Titans? Or your family? You’re scaring everyone, Tim.”

There was a moment of silence before Tim asked, “Which Titans called you?”

“Basically everyone,” Steph answered, “except Cassie, that is.”

Tim tensed up, regretting it instantly because he knew Steph would be able to feel it under her hands.

“Did something happen between you and Cassie?”

Tim shook his head.

“Okay,” Steph said, audibly thinking of what to ask next. “Well, the only other noteworthy thing from the Titans is the fact that I have at least half a dozen voicemails from Superboy, which was surprising because I honestly thought he was dead and--”

Suddenly, Tim was standing up. Then he was off his bed and across the room, running into the bathroom connected to his bedroom. Steph winced as she heard heaving noises coming from the bathroom. When the noises kept going, Steph made her way into the bathroom, prepared for the worst.

“Oh, Tim,” she said gently, kneeling next to her best friend and rubbing soothing circles on his back. “I haven’t seen you this upset in a while.”

When he stopped dry-heaving, Tim paused for a moment, still leaning over the toilet. Eventually, he asked, “Did you listen to any of the voicemails?”

“From Superboy?” Steph asked. “Not yet, no.”

Tim sighed, slumping backwards, away from the toilet but still sitting on the bathroom  
floor. He let himself lean back into Steph, melting into the human contact he had been cutting himself off from for days. 

“When did Superboy come back to life?” Steph asked, running her fingers through Tim’s hair.

“Just a few days ago,” Tim answered softly. “No one knew he was back until the day I left San Francisco earlier this week.”

“Is that why you’re upset? Didn’t you get to see him before you left?”

“No, that’s not the problem,” Tim scoffed. “He followed me back to Gotham.”

“So if you got to see him, what’s the problem?” Steph asked.

“We kissed.”

Steph froze, her hands stopping in the middle of playing with Tim’s hair. “You and Kon? I didn’t even know that he liked--”

“I didn’t know either,” Tim said, cutting her off. “He found me on a rooftop in Gotham and started talking about how he wished he had been more honest, with himself, with me, with everyone, before he died. He said that now that he got another chance, he wanted to tell me how he really felt about me. And then he kissed me.”

Steph listened, taking it all in. She was just glad that Tim was speaking in more than single sentences. Still, the information was hitting her like a ton of bricks. She had been there for Tim when he was pining after Superboy, before he was with Jason. She had watched rom-coms and eaten ice cream with Tim while he tried to forget that Kon was with Cassie. She had not-so secretly cheered Tim on when he had began to fall for Jason, because she knew that Kon had only ever caused Tim pain.

“Did you tell Jason?”

There was a pause before Tim weakly answered:

“I didn’t have to. He saw.”

\------

“You’re sure he cheated on you?” Dick asked.

“Yes, Dick, I’m sure,” Jason answered, obviously restraining himself. “I saw him do it, I saw him kissing--” Jason stopped, unable to continue.

Dick waited a moment, unsure of how to proceed without making things worse. “Who was it?” he asked, finally.

Jason’s face scrunched up, like he was trying to force tears back. “It was Kon, Superboy. I guess he’s back from the dead, which apparently is Timmy’s type,” he said, putting his hand over his face.

Dick frowned Jason’s comment. “Have you talked to him?”

Jason shook his head. “What would I say?”

“That’s up to you,” Dick said slowly. “Are you going to break up with him?”

“I think it goes without saying that we’re over,” Jason said. “I have a pretty good idea of where I stand with Tim, he obviously knows what he did and what he wants, so I don’t see the point in rehashing things.”

Dick sighed, knowing that there was no getting through to Jason when he set his mind on something. “Let me know if you need anything, okay?”

Jason nodded, letting Dick squeeze his shoulder before he left the apartment.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is really short. I'm trying to get to the part where Tim and Jason actually have to face each other, but I feel like I keep detouring. I'm going back to school soon, so updates will be whenever they can be, but I am still invested in this story. I'd love to hear your thoughts below, it's always so nice to get kudos and comments :)

Bruce went down to the Batcave and was surprised to find Jason training. Well, if you could call it training; he was really just pummeling the life out of a few punching bags. Bruce stood close to where Jason was ‘training’ and cleared his throat, unsure of how to approach Jason. 

Jason landed on last hit and threw himself against the punching back, leaning on it with a sigh. He looked up and saw Bruce watching him. “Had to get some anger out,” he said, trying to sound casual.

“Is there something you need, Jason?” Bruce asked, stepping closer to the former Robin. Things had been better lately between them. After Jason and Tim had been dating for a month or so, the Red Hood had worked his way into the family’s patrol and mission lineup. Bruce was happy about it, especially because Jason refrained from killing when he worked with them, but also because it was a step in a better direction.

“Yeah, uh,” Jason wiped some sweat off of his forehead, looking down at his feet. “I wanted to ask you not to schedule me with Red Robin for patrols and missions anymore.”

Bruce felt his heart sink, but he just raised an eyebrow at Jason. “Anything you want to talk about?”

“Not really,” Jason said, shaking his head.

“Is there anything I need to know?” Bruce asked.

Jason paused before saying, “Yeah, actually. Tell all your birds to stay away from Red Hood when I’m not working with you guys.”

“Jason, that’s not how this works--”

“If you ask me to do all or nothing right now, the answer is going to be nothing, B.” Jason said, holding Bruce’s gaze. “Shit went down and I just need some of my own space to do my own thing sometimes. If you can’t deal with that, I’m out.”

“If you start killing again, I can’t let you associate with the family,” Bruce said. “That’s not our way and I won’t endorse it.”

“Fine, no killing,” Jason said. “But I’m using live rounds when I’m not with you guys. No kill shots, but when I’m in my territory doing my missions, I’m using my guns.”

Bruce was silent for a moment, weighing his options. “Deal,” he said finally.

“Thank you,” Jason said, sounding suddenly sincere. “I’ve gotta go. I can’t stay here and risk running into...certain people.”

Bruce nodded, turning away from Jason as he went to exit the Batcave and return to the house. Dick was standing in the doorway, looking concerned.

“You’re really okay with that compromise?” Dick asked.

“I can’t lose him again,” Bruce answered.

“Yeah, I get it,” Dick said. “If you’re interested, I got Jason’s side of what’s going on with Tim.”

Bruce furrowed his brow. “Anything to explain why Jason just asked me not to assign him to anything with Red Robin.”

Dick’s face fell and he nodded.

\----

Steph was still with Tim in his room. Tim really wished she wasn’t, but that didn’t matter to her.

“Why don’t you just explain what happened?” Steph asked. “It’s not like you were having some torrid affair. Kon kissed _you_. You didn’t even initiate it! Jason didn’t see the whole picture and he’s probably blowing it way out of proportion now!”

Tim didn’t say anything. He had stopped speaking about an hour ago and he just wanted Steph to do the same.

“If you would just talk to Jason and explain that it meant nothing--”

“It didn’t mean nothing,” Tim interrupted.

Steph stopped and stared at Tim. “Say what now?”

“When Kon kissed me. It meant something. To me, at least,” Tim explained. 

“But I thought you were over him?”

“I thought I was too,” Tim sighed. “But he was dead. This sounds shitty, but maybe it’s easier to be over someone when they’re gone.”

“And now that Kon’s not gone anymore?” Steph asked cautiously.

Tim buried his face in his hands. “I don’t know. But I can’t tell Jason in good consciousness that the kiss meant nothing. Not when it gave me all of these confusing feelings.”

Steph pulled Tim into a hug. “I’m so sorry,” she said softly.

“So am I.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I mentioned before, I went back to school, so that's why this update took so long. I was writing it out in tiny pieces and it felt like it took forever, but I'm finally happy (or at least okay) with the results. I'm done school in a few weeks and I'm not sure what my summer schedule looks like yet, but hopefully the next update won't take as long. Anyways, enjoy!

It took a few more days for Jason and Tim to bump into each other. And when they did, it was definitely not on purpose.

Tim had finally left his room, mostly because he realized that Steph would just continue to camp out in there and bother him. If he was going to have to talk to someone, Tim decided that he might as well get some fresh coffee out of it. That’s how Tim found himself working on his case research in the manor’s kitchen, nursing what had to be at least his fourth cup of coffee, despite the fact that it was going on 2am.

Tim nearly jumped out of his skin, thanks to the caffeine, when he heard the screen door to the backyard fly open. He instantly slipped into a state of alertness, creeping around the corner to peer into the living room and see what had made its way past all of their security.

He was in for an even worse shock when he looked around the corner and found himself face to face with Jason. Tim’s heart stopped. He felt his hands start to shake, more than they had been shaking before, and suddenly there was a lump in his throat.

“Jason,” Tim said breathlessly. He stared at Jason, taking in everything he could. He hadn’t seen his boyfriend, if he could still call him that, in almost a week now, and he had missed him. He had so much to say to him and he had no clue where or how to start.

“Timbo,” Jason said, a little too loudly and definitely too happily. He had a goofy grin plastered on his face and he was leaning on the wall for support.

He was drunk.

“Jason, how did you get in here?”

“I climbed the fence,” Jason said casually, like they were talking about the weather and like they hadn’t been avoiding each other for about a week now.

“You know that you could have just used the front door?”

“Didn’t want to wake anyone up,” Jason said, slurring his words together a little. “Just needed to come home.”

Tim didn’t know what to say to that. He found himself wondering if Jason had needed to come home for a few days now and that he hadn’t been able to because Tim was here. Tim also found himself feeling like a jackass for not wondering that sooner.

“Jason, if you need me to leave the manor so you can be here,” Tim began to offer, struggling to speak past the growing lump in his throat.

“Why did you do it, Tim?” Jason asked suddenly, cutting him off.

Tim shouldn’t have been surprised. He wasn’t, really, but he still didn’t know what to say. He could explain himself, could tell Jason that Kon had kissed him, but at the end of the day, it didn’t really matter who kissed whom.

“You know what,” Jason spoke again when Tim had been silent for too long, “forget it. I don’t need to know. I don’t want to know.”

“Jason,” Tim said carefully, still finding it hard to speak. “Whatever you want or need to know, I’ll tell you. It’s the least I can do.” Tim tried to blink back tears, hating how vulnerable he felt. “But I don’t think now is the time. If you really want to have this conversation, I think we should both be in our right minds.” _Which you are not, at the moment,_ Tim added silently.

“Fuck that,” Jason said, slowly but with force. “There’s something that I need to know and the longer I don’t know, the crazier I feel.”

Tim sighed. “Fine, what is it?”

Suddenly, Jason looked sober as a nun. His mouth was drawn in a tight line and Tim tried to ignore the shudder that ran through his body. He had only ever seen Jason look at one person like this before, and that was Bruce. “Jason?” Tim prompted, hoping that whatever Jason was about to ask him was better than this silence.

“When did it start?” Jason asked. “Did this just happen because he came back to life? Or was there something going on before he died?”

“Nothing happened before that kiss you saw, I swear.” Tim said, trying to sound as sincere as possible. “He was with Cassie until the day he died.”

Jason was quiet for a moment, pain flooding his features as he thought. “Is that the only reason we were together? Because he was with Cassie?”

“No, of course not, Jason, I--”

“Was I just a consolation prize? And now that he’s back and apparently willing, you can just toss me aside?” Jason continued, cutting Tim off.

“It’s not like that--”

“Because that’s what it looks like. I thought what we had was real, but the minute that dumbass clone came back to life, you ran right to him. You didn’t even have the decency to break things off with me first. And how stupid are you, kissing him in Gotham?” Jason chuckles darkly. “You probably could’ve gotten away with it if you had just stayed in San Francisco.”

“Jason, I wasn’t trying to get away with anything! I love you!” Tim exclaimed. He saw the hurt filtering through the glare Jason was now leveling at him. “I _love_ you. And I’m not saying that to try to make up for what I did; I’m saying it because it’s true. I care about you so much and I hate that I hurt you like this. Please believe me, it was just that kiss. Nothing else happened between me and Kon.”

Jason brushed off Tim’s confession, clearly following his own train of thought. “Roy thought it was weird that you and I weren’t ‘official’ until Superboy died,” he said quietly. “I always kind of thought that you cared what he thought, but not like this. I thought it was just because he wouldn’t approve, and he was still your friend, but apparently it was more than that, and I--”

“Jason, stop,” Tim said firmly, cutting him off. “You’re rambling and you’re just making yourself feel worse.”

Jason looked away, hiding his eyes from Tim. “Why should you care how I feel all of a sudden?”

“What do you want from me!?” Tim exclaimed. “I try to give you space; you want to talk about shit anyways. I try to talk to you; you don’t like what I have to say. I try to show you that I still care; you throw it back in my face. I don’t know what you want!”

Jason’s jaw dropped a bit and his eyes went wide. “Unbelievable,” he muttered, running a hand through his hair. “You’re fucking unbelievable, you know that?”

“I don’t know what you mean,” Tim said, jaw set stubbornly.

“I mean that you hurt me, and somehow I’m in the wrong,” Jason snapped.

“This isn’t about wrong and right,” Tim said, but then paused. _What the hell is this about?_ He wondered. “But if it was, I’m obviously in the wrong here. So if that’s what you needed to hear, there you go.”

“I know that,” Jason said quietly. “I know what you did was wrong, but somehow I can’t shake the feeling that I did something wrong first to cause it.”

Tim shook his head. “Jason, none of this is your fault.”

Jason sighed. “I wish that made me feel better.”

“I’m sorry.”

Jason looked at him, holding his gaze with shimmering eyes. Then suddenly, as if he was broken out of a trance, he shook his head and looked away. He muttered something about having to leave as he made his way to the backyard.

Tim didn’t follow him, because honestly, he felt like he had already done too much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, kudos and comments are appreciated! Also, if you want to check out my DC tumblr, it's arkhamknightmare.tumblr.com


	5. Chapter 5

“This isn’t really what I expected.”

Tim looked up at Kon. The metahuman had his hands stuffed awkwardly in his pockets and there was already a pout slowly taking shape on his face. Tim was trying to remember why he had thought it was a good idea to invite Kon to Gotham for this conversation.

“What do you mean?” Tim asked from his spot on the couch. He only sat on his side of the couch, refusing to touch the side that had become Jason’s over the past few months.

“Not to sound like an ass-”

“Great, good start,” Tim muttered.

Kon frowned, but kept going. “I kind of expected a different reaction from you.” He looked down at his feet, before saying, “I definitely didn’t expect you to be fucking the guy who beat the shit out of you.”

“It’s not like that,” Tim snapped. He sighed, rubbing his temples gingerly. “That was once, and even though you’ve never let it go, I have.”

“What was once, the fucking or the beating the shit out of you?”

“I don’t know why I thought this could be a mature conversation,” Tim said as he got up off the couch. “Maybe you should just go.”

“Is that what you want?” Kon asked, sounding incredulous. “I thought that you’d--”

“That I’d what, Kon?” Tim snapped. “That I’d just drop everything and come running into your arms? Were you just counting on the fact that I was so hopelessly in love with you that I would’ve put my life on hold and sit around waiting for you to come back?”

“It’s not like that, Tim.”

Tim laughed. “You really fucked things up, you know that?”

“Sorry for not being dead,” Kon snapped.

“You could’ve come back to life without derailing my relationship!”

“Could I?”

The tension in the room was suddenly palpable.

“What is _that_ supposed to mean?” Tim asked.

“I don’t know, man,” Kon said. “I just kissed you. You could have easily explained to Jason that it was my fault. You didn’t do anything. So to me, it looks like one of two things is happening here. Either you tried to explain that to him and he was an ass about it--”

“He wouldn’t--”

“Or,” Kon continued, speaking over Tim’s interruption. “You’re the one with the problem. You have feelings for me still, and that’s why it wasn’t just a kiss.”

“Get out,” Tim said quietly, glaring at Kon from across the room.

“Why? Because I’m right and you don’t like the truth?”

“No, because you’re obviously incapable of thinking about anyone besides yourself!” Tim said. “You came back and decided that your feelings mattered more than anyone else’s. You hurt me, you hurt Jason, and you hurt Cassie. Don’t you ever think before you act?”

“You’re just projecting,” Kon sneered. “I know you, and I know that you don’t believe I hurt Jason and Cassie. You’re already blaming yourself, so don’t throw this back on me.”

“Right, because you’re obviously the victim here!”

“I died!”

“Oh, so dying is a viable reason for you to be a douche, but for Jason it’s just a lame excuse?” Tim said.

“Why are you always so quick to defend him? He hurt you, Tim.”

“No, _you_ hurt me,” Tim said. “Jason hurt me, but that was before he knew me, and that was barely even him. Also, he’s apologized countless times for attacking me in the tower. Unlike you. You hurt me, over and over again, every time you chose Cassie over me. And not just romantically, because that’s not fair. But the minute you started dating her, it was like I didn’t exist anymore. And you never apologized. You never even realized how much you hurt me.”

“Tim--”

“When you came back, when you found me on that rooftop in Gotham the other week, I was mostly expecting some speech about how you were a shitty friend near the end. I was ready to start over, to try to make things better,” Tim said. “But no, you just went and screwed everything up. Things are weird with my family now because of how hurt Jason is. Bruce won’t say it, but I know he’s upset that I’m pushing Jason away after he was finally coming back home.”

“Tim, please, I--”

“And I can’t go back to San Francisco, that’s for sure. Do you know how much Cassie hates me right now?” Tim asked, shaking his head. “She’d probably kill me on sight. And she has every right to be pissed. We both missed you so much. We tried to be there for each other, even though stuff was weird between us before you died, and now it seems like I betrayed her.”

“You didn’t betray her,” Kon said weakly.

“I mean kind of,” Tim said. “You’re the one who really betrayed her. I’ll take the blame for Jason, because you’re right, I do still have some kind of feelings for you. Those feelings sure as hell came back to the surface when you kissed me.”

“Are you sure those feelings didn’t come back just because I’m not dead anymore?”

“Don’t flatter yourself, Kon,” Tim muttered. “Jason and I were together before you died.”

“And you didn’t tell me?”

Tim stared at Kon, his mouth hanging open in disbelief.

“Alright, you need to leave.”

Kon turned around in surprise at the sound of a new voice in the apartment. Nightwing, well, Dick Grayson, actually, was standing in the doorway, leaning in a seemingly nonchalant manner against the doorframe.

“What are you doing here?” Kon asked defensively.

“I’m trying to keep my little brother sane,” Dick replied with a cheery smile that didn’t really match his voice. “So if you don’t mind, you can go now.”

“And if I do mind?”

“Connor,” Tim said, looking between his brother and his ex(?) nervously. “You’re not helping anything by staying.”

“Fine,” Kon said. “But this isn’t over, and you know it.”

Tim and Dick watched as Superboy stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door behind him.

“Well that sounded fun!” Dick said, sitting down on the couch where Connor had been.

“How long were you listening?”

“Long enough to know why you haven’t worked things out yet with Jason,” Dick answered. “I guess? When I talked to Jason, it sounded like you and Connor had been having some affair, but now I know that it was one very one-sided kiss.”

“Yeah, but you also know that it’s a kiss that brought out all kinds of feelings that are really not okay for me to have about someone who isn’t Jason,” Tim said.

“I still think you should talk to him,” Dick said. “He deserves to know the full story.”

“I did talk to him,” Tim muttered, sitting back down on the couch. “It just made things worse.”

“When did you talk to him?”

Tim recounted his encounter with drunk Jason the other night at the manor. He wanted to punch himself in the face as he remembered how horribly the conversation had gone.

“So that’s why you haven’t been home in a few days?” Dick asked when Tim had finished talking.

Tim nodded. “I don’t want to keep him from being there, especially if he needs you guys.”

“He needs you, Tim,” Dick said softly.

Tim put his hands in his face. “Please don’t talk like that,” he said with a sigh. “I really can’t handle that right now.”

“Just think about it, okay?” Dick said. He opened his mouth to say something else, but was cut off by the sound of his phone ringing.

“Hey B, what’s up?” Dick answered, looking at Tim while he spoke. “Yeah, I’ll be there ASAP.” He hung up quickly, jumping off the couch.

“What’s wrong?” Tim asked, standing up and following him to the door. 

“Jason’s in trouble,” was all Dick said before he was out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback is always helpful. I have a vague idea of what I want to do with this story, but I'm not sure how the pacing is going. Also, if you're enjoying this, it's always nice to hear that!


End file.
